YEAH, sam smith! tell it to them! ESPN.com: NBA - Shooting down the double-standard on Kobe

dang, I should write for a sports column. i think i'd do a better job. maybe to get some cash on the side? anybody want to hire me?

jacob from URL @ 11/23/2002 05:05:00 AM

******

those are two lessons learned fairly recently from a movie (beijing bicycle), and book (poisonwood bible).

#1) beijing bicycle
my first reaction: stupid kid. doesn't he know the bigger picture? FOOD. HEAT. CLOTHES. his younger sister's education. his father isn't trying to stiff him on purpose.

my second reaction: a little kid can't understand that there are more important issues. he only knows that all of his friends have bikes, and he doesn't. i used to know this feeling. i felt it all the time, growing up. where something was SO very important to me, but it was trivial to my parents, to adults. sometime over the years, i had forgotten what that felt like. esp in interaction with some of my younger friends.

when we hear a child complain or cry, we think, oh, it's not that bad. but for the child, it is BAD ENOUGH. and it HURTS.

what good is it to tell someone what SHOULD be? i do this all the time, i hear it all the time. things should be like this, like that. fellow christian brothers and sisters should be like this, be like that. rub these shoulds into faces, and you meet fear, rebellion, and drive them away.

far better to understand where they are. to love them as they are, where they are. (as Jesus did)


i sometimes think that perhaps this is the reason why things in this world seem so wacky. why there is hurt, pain and suffering in this world, and it doesn't make sense.

God sees everything. the large, grand, infinite picture. and we, we see our little pocket of vision, like little kids. and from where we stand, heck, things don't make sense. we fail exams, we lose jobs, we lose family members, terrorists shake the foundations of our nation. why, we ask? why, God?

many years down the line, i can look back, and see: wow. that thing that seemed so painful, that actually led to something far greater. and sometimes, i NEEDED to go thru certain experiences to learn, to change. at times like those, i gain a small glimpse, a glimpse past the horizon that limits me.

But God sees everything. it is all completely logical to Him, the complexities that are beyond us. He explained many things to us, through a book called the Bible, patiently explaining, as a parent does to a child. but like children, we don't want to listen nor to read to reason and explanations of God. when we do occasionally get the drive to read, we have such a hard time understanding. because all we know is that we are hurting, and we can't see beyond that.

as a person going thru this walk in life, i need to understand that i am limited to seeing a part of the picture. that i will perhaps never understand the entire picture, until that final day. i need to trust, the one and only being who CAN see the entire picture. my life is in your hands, my God.

as a parent, i hope i will treat my children as people, each with a unique mind and experience and thoughts, not something silly to be brushed away. however silly his/her concerns, i hope that i can meet the importance of the issue at his/her level.

#2) the poisonwood bible
my first reaction: how dare someone portray missionaries, and christians, in this way? there is a part of me that wants to join in missions, at least for a part of my life, and it rankled, that such a noble undertaking would be attacked in this way. that passion and zeal would be attacked in this way.

my second reaction: many missions efforts have historically been just as wacky. scarier, however, was my character study of the missionary. he was an extreme character, to be sure. such a man surely cannot exist. but in him, i saw passion and zeal. characteristics i admire. that i long for, myself.

in HIS character, i saw bits and pieces of my own character. and it frightened me. that i might be so filled with fervor that i might not see that i am hurting those close to me.

i am particularly concerned about my future family. i am a strong-willed person, i know that. i sometimes bully my way through discussions. i know i have the tongue like a blade when i want to.

in the name of work and life for God, i may be moved to do extreme things. how will my wife protest against such a cause? how will my children bring up their childish-seeming desires to their dad, who is on fire to do certain things for God? i can provide the verses, i can provide the solid rationale for doing "holy" work. how will they bring up their points against such things? they can't, and they won't. and i will move with the weight and momentum of a steel engine, and drag my family with me. i am frightened that this might happen.

God, help me. help me be sensitive to those around me. teach me the importance of the life and soul of each person, one person at a time. i pray that i might be a light, a good influence to but one person, one soul on this earth, that that sould might come to know You, and it will be far worthier than all the good deeds that i do in Your name.

zealousness does not equal righteousness. i respect zeal and passion a lot. i am drawn to it in people. yet zeal, passion, those are nothing compared to love.

jacob from URL @ 11/23/2002 03:10:00 AM

i've experienced a lot of emotional devastation, so something in me feels a kindred vibe with those people - even though i NEVER had ANYTHING NEARLY as bad as they did. does that make sense?
yakob78: yeah
yakob78: but even if it is not as bad, still it is BAD ENOUGH for you
shrub775: well, true enough....
yakob78: like when a kid goes thru something,
shrub775: it was certainly bad enough.
yakob78: parents tell them, oh, it's nothing, get over it, etc, etc,
yakob78: but for the KID, it's a huge deal
shrub775: exactly.
yakob78: so, i can understand how your experience was devastating
yakob78: even if it wasn't the holocaust

jacob from URL @ 11/21/2002 02:26:00 AM

i'm sorry you didn't see that my comment was actually a direct answer, not merely a comment for giggles. but because you read words but don't understand em, here goes:

most guys are just living life, man. they see pretty girl, they say, "oooo, pretty girl." it is just acknowledgement. this does not mean, "i want to marry!" nor, "i would like to get in bed with that girl!"

i went to the library to study, stella. i went to the dry cleaners cause i had 12 shirts and 3 slacks that need to go. i walk the streets cause i need to get from home to the library. i don't go anywhere in the anticipation of seeing hot girls. i think this is why God rewards me with a pleasant sighting once in a while. (HAHAHAHA- c'mon, i can't have a COMPLETELY serious comment)

when you take away all real responses and interactions, you get a somewhat false envirnment, which i've been noticing has been creeping into our church. i KNOW girls feel things, talk about issues outside of church, but in church they are really... bland. why is that? (oh boy, this is turning into another guy/girl thing... bleh) all i'm saying is, ppl should be more expressive of what they mean, feel etc, and not just sit quietly, and then get all mad at the guys.

i don't know where this came from. it does not have a biblical basis.

being submissive does not mean being a deaf and mute rock, which seems to be how many ppl are interpreting it.

the big problem, of course, is that said girls are not truly submissive. they are bristling with independence, self-will, and resentment, while struggling mightily to maintain this cover.

the submission the bible speaks of is not exterior. it is one of the heart. all these comments reveal is that this is an unresolved one for many of you. how do you expect to be in a lifetime relationship, if you can not give this up?


i WILL admit to dee's comment. some guys, like me, are very chicken, so nothing happens. that doesn't change the issues that many girls have.

jacob from URL @ 11/19/2002 05:48:00 AM

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